7 Foolproof Ways to Get Over Your Ex
How many times have you broken up with someone, only to immediately wish for them back?
Or maybe you’ve broken up a few times, but this is “the final time.”
Your ex is clearly moving on with their life, but you can’t seem to let them go, no matter how long it’s been. Unfortunately, time doesn’t heal all wounds. Putting in the work heals all wounds. Making positive changes in your life will heal your broken heart.
Here are 7 foolproof ways to get over your ex.
Cut them off completely
If you’ve ever listened to my podcast, Date Smarter Sexier, you’ve probably heard me talk about being friends with my exes. But what I might not have been clear on is that I wasn’t in love with those particular exes. I can only be friends with him if it was a short-lived relationship where we realized we were better off as friends. Otherwise, the men who have broken my heart are out of my life completely. You can’t mend your heart if your nose is always being rubbed in “what might have been” moments with your ex.
2. Get rid of things that remind you of them
Does your pillowcase smell of her perfume? Or you kept his favorite college shirt to wear when he wasn’t there? Get a new pillow case. Donate the shirt. If your house reminds you of them then rearrange the furniture or get a new picture for the living room wall. Clearly you can’t throw out the house but you can make enough changes so it feels like your space rather than our space.
3. Don’t visit “your spots” anymore
Frequent the local bistro for your regular date nights? Give another restaurant your attention for a while. It doesn’t mean you can never go back to that bistro ever again. It means you need time to heal and not being reminded of your ex all the time is the only way to get over them. So take a break from the places you frequented together. Try
something new.
4. Create a new story to things that remind you of them
If there are things in your life that you can’t get rid of like the house, car, or kids, then you’ll need to create a new memory to attach to those things. The house can be rearranged, or you can take the kids out to explore new adventures together. Obviously, not everything can get replaced so you need to create new memories around those things that are no longer associated with the ex.
5. Work on yourself
Join a gym, take a course, start a gratitude journal. Find positive ways to heal your heartache. Sure, could you start dating and sleep around to forget about your ex? Yeah, I’m not going to lie that has worked to some degree for people. Often, it doesn’t last though. You find yourself comparing the new people to the ex and then wonder why the relationships don’t work. You start to think you’ll never find someone again and that maybe you should just force it to work with the ex.
In reality, you are trying to move on too quickly without healing. So take the time to grow and mend your heart. Learn a new hobby or sign up for relationship coaching - but do something that helps you grow as a person. Becoming a better version of yourself will assure that you find the right partner when you are ready to start dating again.
6. Stop daydreaming about what could have been
We are all guilty of doing this. We love to daydream when we first start dating, when we are in a healthy relationship, and after it ends. We are built for daydreaming. So it’s unfair to tell you to stop daydreaming. Simply start daydreaming about the new relationship you can have with yourself or a new partner. Change the characters of your daydreams.
7. Know there is someone better for you
They are NOT the last person on earth. You need to trust that there is someone out there better suited for you than your ex. No, they won’t have the same smile or maybe they won’t make you pancakes in bed on Saturday mornings, but they’ll have other things to fall in love with. It might take some time to find them but they are out there and they are waiting for a partner just like you.
The Other Best Way to Get Over Your Ex
If you are struggling to do this on your own, then getting yourself a good breakup coach is key. Having an unbiased professional to keep you accountable, teach you ways to heal, and give you the tools to make the next one work, can be a real game changer in your dating life. If you’re ready to mend your broken heart, book a call with me to find out how we can do it together.
